Time to Talk Day 2019

Did you know that today is a national awareness day to break the silence surrounding Mental Health Problems?

"Too often, people who experience a mental health problem are also expected to take the lead on talking about mental health in the wider sense. Time To Talk Day encourages everyone to talk about mental health.

Mental health problems affect one in four of us yet people are still afraid to talk about it. For people with mental health problems not being able to talk about it can be one of the worst parts of the illness. So by getting people talking about mental health we can break down stereotypes, improve relationships, aid recovery and take the stigma out of something that affects us all.

Since Time To Talk Day first launched in 2014, it has sparked millions of conversations in schools, homes, workplaces, in the media and online."

- Taken from the Awareness Days Website - Time to Talk Day 

DISCLAIMER: This blog post discusses sensitive topics surrounding mental health. Reader discretion is advised.

Back in November, I went on a two day Mental Health First Aid Training Course and it was fantastic. It is so great to see more people acknowledging the importance of talking about your own mental health but also courses like this, guiding others with less personal understanding of mental health, to know how to respond when someone needs that all important communication. 

One of the things we discussed on the course was how everyone has mental health, just like physical health. We should all be discussing our mental health because it exists in all of us. As mentioned above, issues with bad mental health affect as many as one in four of us... 

Think of it this way, (based on those statistics) on an average night at the studio we see maybe... 10-15 people that may be dealing with poor mental health. 

I myself have spent many years understanding what causes me to have poor mental health and how to work towards better mental health. It all started, I thought, when I went to University at the age of 20 but in hindsight I think I'd always had trouble with lots of ignored issues surrounding my self-esteem, my self image, my sleep, my eating habits etc. 

The first time I remember thinking "oh dear, I think I might need some help with whatever this is" was when I began having panic attacks. They would last sometimes hours and I would spend that time curled in a ball under a cold shower, shaking and thinking I would die. I genuinely mean that too. I thought my body was giving up on me, my heart was pounding so fast I kept telling my boyfriend I was having a heart attack and he needed to call for help. 

I'm very lucky to have had the support system I did (that was him and his family), otherwise I'm not sure I would be here today. His family, unlike mine, had always been incredibly communicative about what they were feeling. He knew that what I was dealing with was panic, he was well versed in all things mental health because of his home environment with his open parents and sister who was studying to become a Clinical Psychologist at the time.

I initially spent the best part of a year having every test available done at my local doctors, insisting there was a physical problem with me and they needed to find it. I may have even told one doctor I thought they weren't doing their job properly when they mentioned talking therapies. I'm not sure if it was a lightbulb moment or if I was just beginning to grow tired when I accepted that it might have something to do with my mental health. 

The moment I began openly talking about how I felt, was the moment I began to feel better. I'm definitely not saying that it's an easy answer and you may even come up against people who simply don't understand what you're going through. I remember telling my closest friends at University that I was probably going to drop out and get the help I needed because I couldn't get through an hour without having suicidal thoughts. To which I was greeted by "but you're not depressed, you're always so happy and smiley" and "oh you'll be alright just try and keep busy with other things". I appreciate now that it wasn't that they were being dismissive of me or my feelings, simply that they just couldn't relate to it, having never experienced anything like it themselves. 

On the walk home, another of my friends pulled me aside and said she had 'heard me'. That she herself had experienced similar feelings and that I wasn't alone. Although we all have a responsibility to look after ourselves, we also have a responsibility to look out for those around us. Her simple act of reaching out to me to tell me I wasn't crazy or alone, meant that I fought harder knowing she had my back, even when I felt like others didn't. She helped signpost me to the amazing resources on offer at our University campus and I met my first ever therapist.

No person is the same. I cannot directly understand what you're going through, no one can. But having had my own experiences of issues with bad mental health, I can empathise with someone who is learning about their own. 

Over the years I have tried Guided Self Help, talking sessions with a number of different therapists and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). I've also been on a variety of medication and found the friends and family members who I feel safe to talk with. It takes some time to strike a balance between what works for you and what doesn't but don't give up. If one therapist isn't right for you, there's a thousand others who might be. It's trial and error which I know can be exhausting but there are a million resources out there. Following the training I received, I was given a manual with lots of helpful resources. If there is anything specific you need help with, we could look together. I have listed but a few below.

Crisis Line - Samaritans: Freephone, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week 116 123

Information - Mind: Local call rates, 9am-6pm, Mon-Fri 0300 123 3393

You can get free psychological therapies like CBT on the NHS. You don't need a referral from your GP. You can now refer yourself directly to a therapies service.

Psychological therapies services are also known as Improving Access to Psychological Therapies (IAPT) services can help with common mental health problems like stress, anxiety and depression.

Berkshire Talking Therapies 

Hampshire Talking Therapies

The NHS also have an online apps library to help manage and improve your mental health.

The next time you ask someone "How are you today?" say it with meaning as it might just be exactly what that person needs.

__________

You can always talk to me, Katy, your instructor or a trusted friend.
If you do not feel able to directly seek help alone,
one of these people can help get the ball rolling. 

I know it's very hard to reach out,

just know that if you feel you'd like to talk, we're all ears.